My Advice to those with Aspergers

For this post, I’m not really going to talk about myself much. In fact, I’m not going to talk about myself at all (save for this opening statement). I’m going to speak a little bit about people in general, and maybe offer a little bit of advice to people with Aspergers or any parents of people with Aspergers.

Here’s my advice to those with Aspergers. If you’re struggling to connect with anyone or you’re finding that life is hard in general- believe me, it’s not. I know Aspergers/Autism affects various people differently so I can’t speak for everyone. One common known thing though is Social Anxiety. Some people struggle to get out their words. And what I can tell you is that it’s not as difficult as it seems. It doesn’t matter what age you are, a new friendship always starts with a simple ‘hello’. Remember that Social Anxiety isn’t just limited to people with disorders. It’s a common problem for a few people, but everything is overcome. Find someone with your shared interests and then you’ll easily hit it off. But i’m going to remind you once more that it isn’t as hard as it seems.

And now I’m going to give you advice on your behaviour. I know it’s unpredictable but just think of who is around you. Some days you can be sad, some you can be happy and some days you can be downright angry at the world. That’s why families exist (Well that, and their undying love for their family). If you’re giving your parents a hard time, just remember that they are trying their best to make sure you are happy. Don’t be hard on them, they aren’t doing anything wrong. If anything, they are heroes for being able to handle someone with mixed emotions (hint: this is usually just a teenage thing).

If I had to give the parents some advice, my advice would be time. If your child has Aspergers/Autism then just have patience with them. The best thing you can do is wait. It’s not easy having Aspergers. It seems like one of the hardest things in the world to deal with, but it really isn’t. You guys are absolute heroes for dealing with this. They may not say it, but secretly they know you’re just trying to help and if anything I respect you for it.

A Little Update

Hey, it’s been a while. How’ve you been?

Which is what I would say if I was talking to a real person. Perhaps whoever reads this is a real person. Unless you’re a bot. I hate those things. Anyway, getting back on track…

It has certainly been a while. My last post was Christmas related and it’s now March so we’re creeping up on Easter. However, I want to give an update on everything in either my personal life or related to the blog or even related to the campaign.

As far as my personal life goes, life recently has had both its ups and its downs. I celebrated my Birthday with a couple of college friends and reunited with an old friend from primary school whom I haven’t seen for 3 years until then. And people from Uni were there too, duh. I had a bad experience with my Aspergers about two months back but thanks to Alex and a phone call from Rahib and Danny I was able to calm down. As I’ve mentioned before it’s not easy. Aspergers can take many forms and affect people very differently. Some have severe Aspergers; some have it mild. I guess I’m an in between person. (It really doesn’t help my OCD either).

Also, I’ve moved in with a a dude and a couple of dudettes (Ok, the dude is also a dudette, I think. I may have to ask him one day.) It’s a nice house built for six people but enough of that. It’s fair to say that I’m currently at a good point in my life and for once I’m not trying to ruin it by thinking of the next bad thing that comes my way… yet.

 

Now, as far as the blog goes it will be started up again pretty soon. I have no intention of ending it; it’s just that I’ve felt no need to post for a while. However, what I want to do is make this thing a little more noticeable to people. Hence why I’m starting a few new things. One is to get the stories of people with Aspergers and Autism and with their permission I will post it on here. The other is to possibly give access of this blog to my friends and they can give their own unique perspective.  And a third is to offer my advice and my family’s advice each week by letting them tell you how you can deal with people with Aspergers and other forms of Mental Disabilities. There will be other plans but I’ll make that announcement pretty soon.

 

And finally, as far as the campaign goes I’ve been too preoccupied with other things at the moment to sort this out. Eventually I’ll get around to it. I have a couple of people based in my committee now and in about a week or two I’ll announce who they are via the blog. I’m hoping to at least start it by the end of the year but right now I’m focused on University due to the fact I have a few assignments headed my way in about a month or two.

 

Anyway, I’m glad to see if any non-robots will read this blog and I hope to get the ball rolling on this thing soon. #IAMME2016 is going to come. I’ll see you soon!!

It’s on its Way!!

Ok, so I can officially announce that the I Am Me Official Campaign is on i’s way!!

I’m halfway through choosing my committee as we speak and I’ll officially announce who they are in the coming weeks.

But bear in mind that we’re coming pretty soon, so keep your eyes peeled!!

I thank everyone who has seen my posts from Day One yet again (Trust me, it’s like a switch I can’t turn off).

The Campaign is expected to begin between February-April, so let’s get it started… in heeerrrrrreeeeee. (Nope, stop it. No song references. I promise I’ll stop.)

Anyway, I hope everyone had a great New Year and let’s get this thing of to a wonderful start! I’ll see y’all soon!

I’m Scared

If you read this, I challenge you. I challenge you to write a post on social Media with the hashtag #BECAUSEIAMSCARED. However read this story first and the details will be placed in the bottom. When you write this, please share the link to this post and if you know the author (IE Me, Lukas Harrison) tag me in so I can see it or if you’re a friend of a friend tag them in it and share it with others.

Now imagine you’re at a bar/club/restaurant/school/whatever. Now imagine you’re a guy/girl that’s sat close to another guy/girl. You really have a crush on this person and you walk up to them and you have no idea what to say. Scratch that. We’ll remove even walking up to them because you’re too nervous to even approach them. Try having that but with ten million worse things running around your head.

And we all know it as Social Anxiety.

You want to know why I write everything down? Because I’m too scared to say it aloud. Normal people can address their issues with others but I turn to my blog. It’s my solace and my passion at the same time. But it’s also the one thing that holds me back.

When in general conversation I have over a million thoughts in my head. And yet none of them are to do with what we’re talking about. And then people look at me because i’m off in space with Sandra Bullock trying to get back to Earth but having multiple failed attempts because I have no George Clooney to help me.

You look at me and you see me as this possibly nice, handsome guy who practically laughs and smiles at everything because I have a little bit of charm. But what you don’t know is that inside I don’t have a clue what to say.

Communication has been hard for me. Then again, it may be hard for a couple of people with the same. Some of us have it hard so we seek solace within a book or a TV or something else. It’s because we’re scared.  It’s because we don’t know who to talk to or what to do.

I may be droning on a bit and going off topic but it’s something I want to get off my chest. In High School was practically the worst time for me. I never liked speaking to people. I was always the quietest one of the bunch. The past is a little vague but I remembered something about bullying. I was convinced everyone hated me when I may have just been paranoid.

I’m not afraid to admit now that I’m scared. I’m scared that I’ll push people away because there’s nothing I can say to make it better. I’m scared I’ll lose my friends because of something stupid that will probably not even happen. I’m shut in. I’m locked away. I don’t want to talk to people because I’m fucking terrified of how everything will turn out.

But I can face it. And I’m not alone.

I can fight it. Of course I can. There’s nothing stopping me from doing it. I have friends who support me no matter how hard it gets for me. Aspergers is fucking small in comparison to everything else. Depression and Anxiety scare others but with the right friends and relationships it can be slowly overcome.

And this is where the challenge comes in…

A couple of months ago I set a challenge for people  for #IAMME. Sadly I didn’t see as many captioned photos as I’d hoped but I’m grateful for the people that showed everything and shared the initial link. So let’s make the next one go viral.  This is where my next challenge comes in. I want people to use the hashtag #BECAUSEIAMSCARED and I want you to tell me what scares you. Put it on social media (I.E. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter etc). It can be as long or as short as you want but make it count for something. Share your story and tell people what scares you. You should never be scared.

Thank You

I know I’m not exactly present on here (in fact I’ve decide to scrap my weekly summary so don’t expect anymore of that) but I do post here. In fact I’m actually here to say thank you to those that read my initial post. The response has been overwhelmingly positive and I want to thank each and every single person that has looked at this.

First of all, I want to thank those around the world from countries such as the UK (where I’m actually from), the USA, Canada, Phillipines, France, Australia, New Zealand. I’ve had roughly around 500 visitors. It may not seem much but to me it’s the greatest thing I feel i’ve had for me as such so far.

Next I want to thank my loving, supporting family for being there no matter what my behaviour has been like. I’m extremely grateful to call you my family.

And finally, my friends. I’m glad that you’re such great people who are there for me and helpful if I struggle with anything. I really couldn’t ask for better friends. No matter where you’re from or who you are I’m just glad you are my friends.

Ok, now that the mushy thank you stuff has finished I will say that I’m working on an official date for the campaign to begin. So far I have three committee members on my side which could hopefully lead to more. If you have any questions be sure to check out “IAmMe: The Campaign” on Twitter or “I AM ME: A Charity Campaign” on Facebook and message me with any queries or if you also have Aspergers and just want a general chat.

With that said, I may have a Dealing with Aspergers Post coming up sometime this month but if not, I wish you all a Merry Christmas (or Hanukkah, or Eid (even though I’m sure those have finished)). I’ll see you in the New Year!

Surprise Announcement: I’m Writing a Book!!

It’s only been a day since I’ve started writing it but I’m happy to announce I’m writing a book on Aspergers. Right now I have no name for it but it’s going so well that I have up to 4150 words in Chapter 2. That’s right, Chapter 2. It’s an emotionally driven book that details my struggles and how I can overcome it. I’ll even be getting stories from other people with Aspergers and getting extracts from experts on the subject. I’ll even be getting my own parents to write a chapter each on their experiences with a child with Aspergers and how they deal with it.

This is a project I’m excited to come up with as it is both informal and entertaining to read (Trust me, practically my life story is in the entire second chapter). I want parents to understand their children a little better so they’ll have eyewitness accounts of people with Aspergers and experts talking about it and even my parent’s accounts. I don’t have a publisher right now but I will be looking at finding one in the near future once my book is finished.

In other news, I’ve just taken part in an interview with a dear friend of mine as part of her student documentary project. I can’t exactly announce when the project is going up because that isn’t up to me but as soon as it is posted with her permission I will be happy to share it with you!!

Dealing with Aspergers: Part 1: Behavioural Issues

I’m going to post this separately from my weekly blog or more or less post it after. Depending on how I feel or see fit this could go out Tuesday the 17th, Wednesday the 18th or so on. But there’s something I want to tell everyone who reads this blog. And this is formed around behavioural issues and is more or less pointing towards my family and friends (People will be named in this so I hope you don’t mind if you are mentioned (Either way though you have no choice and for that I apologise in advance)).

I know some of you understand my disorder perfectly well (E.G. Mum, Dad and Evan) because they’re my family, duh. They have a better understanding of my Aspergers because they’ve lived with it for almost 21 years. They know what it’s like to deal with my behaviour. This is the case for my friends too, whether they’re ones from Uni or College.

My Aspergers affects my behaviour in various different ways. Asperger’s in general affects people differently whether it’s behaviour or something. Most of the time I can seem nice. I can seem like one of the kindest people you may have ever met. I’m not a teenager anymore so it stops all mood swings (Puberty was soooo 5 years ago, get over it) (Ignore that. I have no idea why I placed it there but I want to keep it in anyway). There are others times when I can be hostile. I’m easily provoked. I may not be physically hostile but you could say the smallest of things and it would set me off. Let’s just say that if my internet goes down I start panicking. That’s how my behaviour affects me.

Another part of me which I feel stands to reason is my lack of social skills. Granted thanks to people like Danny, Rahib, Jack and Rob from college and people from University like Alex, Vicky, Cat, Keenan, Courtney, Rob, Joe and so on and so forth I have accepted myself when coming into social circles. (I’m gonna admit if it wasn’t for people like Alex, Cat and Vicky I probably wouldn’t talk to anyone at Uni so thanks for helping me out here and allowing me to be socially active, although if you mention it to me in public I will not say anything).

Finally, my other significant emotion that most likely kind of points towards everyone because it’s not an isolated subject comes in the form of what appears to be sadness, or fear. The only reason I wrote my blog in the first place was the fear that I had Anxiety. Luckily it’s just something that it part of my Aspergers. It’s not just that though this stems from a conversation I had with someone through Facebook Messenger whom I will not mention so I can keep confidentiality for it but that person knows who they are. (If said person does not if it’s about them it stems from a conversation in late October and is the same day I posted my first blog and you can just message me if you don’t know to confirm if it’s you). Also, if you see me moping around for no reason just ignore it. Once in a while i’ll just mope around so it’s nothing. You can check on me if you want but it’ll most likely be the same answer.

…Aaaaaand that’s it. My next DWA post will be focused on Social Anxiety (Like I mentioned in the second paragraph but a little more detail). I’ll most likely release one of these every month so it’s not a constant thing. I might also have another announcement coming that’s not as big as the last one but will have some significance. Until next time my friends…